Miss Ellie was totally unfair to Bobby in the aftermath of Jock's death. She wants everything to go back to normal and when Bobby tells her that he's trying to do that and he may have to step in as president temporarily.
Miss Ellie was in denial. Basically, she was afraid to confront the reality so acted like the reality never really happened. When it finally hit, that famous scene in the kitchen when she broke down. This is how some people grieve.
She talks about having everyone at dinner, Bobby tells her, having Dinner together isn't going to make things normal, Miss Ellie says, neither is removing JR from the presidency.
Both of them were correct.
My issue is that she said it as if Bobby had an ulterior motive. It seemed that whenever they were in a pickle, always because of JR, they ask for Bobby's help and then hangs him out to dry. Plus, Bobby was the only one adult enough to deal with Jock's death. JR and Ray were totally out of it and Miss Ellie was in denial.
Bobby had a very good relationship with his father, with far less baggage than his siblings. J.R. saw Jock as the ultimate man, the epitome of Ewing Oil who led J.R. into the oil business and now J.R. himself had taken over. J.R. saw a lot of Jock's hard side, and sucked it all up. Gary has loads of baggage with Jock, a lot of mixed feelings from love, lack of warmth and empathy, distrust, betrayal, even hate. Ray saw Jock as a hero, a figurehead, who took him into Southfork, who gave him some rich plot of land on Southfork, and who he discovered was his father not that long before Jock's death.
J.R., Gary and Ray all have baggage with Jock of some kind. Bobby doesn't. Bobby was spoiled rotten by Jock in comparison.
Frankly, I was shocked at how quickly Bobby expected J.R. and Ray to just get back to normal. J.R. could never really separate the personal and the professional, so the end of Jock makes him think it's the end of Ewing Oil or that it'll never the same again. It took J.R. time to realize that it was about carrying on his father's legacy.