Living in the Cul-de-Sac: Season 9 for the First Time

[JROG]

I figured I'd finish what I started, despite the Soap Chat Armageddon. And, thanks to @Miss Texas 1967 explaining that cached view voodoo, I got back some of the posts I hadn't saved!

So, once more, let's move into the cul-de-sac!

EPISODE 1: MISSING PERSONS

A new season, new beginnings -- but you wouldn't know it from what's on screen. For the first time ever, it feels like KL has returned with no renewed energy, no start-of-the-season excitement, and absolutely no movement at all. Well, to be fair, things have changed: The paint-splat opening debuts. It seems the producers did that and then forgot to move along everything else.

Poor Gary is in a particular rut, almost an afterthought (he's felt this way ever since his campaign ended). Abby seems to be just a tad dumber than she's ever been, her freak-out over the playground made so obvious for the sole purpose of making Karen suspicious. As if Abby would ever do that. It's such a relief that Peter's body is found by the end -- don't know how much more of this I could take.

This being KL, of course, the show does end up picking itself up and provides for a couple of very interesting moments: While the material with Mack and Paige is almost eye-roll worthy, it does provide the sizzling hot kissing scene between Greg and Paige, and Mack also has a hilarious scene with a man named Al Baker. One has no idea where it was all going, but it ends up being hugely sweet, fun and satisfactory. And who could forget the brilliance of Laura showing up to show off the baby to Val, thus reconciling with her. Laura's haunting, memorable theme plays (albeit with a horrific 80s makeover... or under) and the weight of the past, the history, the years and years that have passed (the magic only soap opera and a long run can provide) come rushing back. Pair that with Van Ark's lovely performance and no, those are not tears streaming down my face. It's simply raining.

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 2: THE TROUBLE WITH PETER

The episode almost exclusively focuses on the discovery of Peter's murder and the investigation that follows. Single-focus soap opera episodes can be highly hit-or-miss but what could easily be the most annoying thing about it ends up becoming the launching pad for a number of ridiculously fun character moments and interactions. While the misunderstanding between Abby and Olivia (Olivia thinks Abby did it! Abby thinks Olivia did it!) continues to prove difficult to resolve, Greg instantly focuses his energy on making sure Abby never gets anything from Peter, a development that promises a lot of story down the line, if its potential is fulfilled. Hilariously, a number of characters instantly point to Abby as the murderer and Abby is put under the microscope. The Trouble with Peter also provides a lovely little shock when Laura announces she's going to visit Richard, who has remarried! When Laura stands up following an argument with Greg, she gets dizzy and has to sit down. It's all so subtle, almost plays as annoyance and standing up too fast on McCashin's behalf, but of course one knows what's coming... and instantly, the suspicion that Laura isn't merely visiting Richard is borne. Val, on the other hand, tells the twins that it's just going to be the three of them from now on (how true that is! She doesn't even count Lilimae!) and later is delighted to see Gary at the cul-de-sac, but he, painfully, completely ignores her, his mind too focused on Abby and his suspicions about her. The episode ends on a very high note when Gary realizes it must have been Olivia who killed Peter and tells Abby about it; Abby slaps him and drives off, leaving Gary completely dumbfounded!

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 3: UNDER PRESSURE

Jill keeps bringing up those super fake childhood memories characters bring up whenever somebody dies and really tries to throw suspicion on the people who left messages on Peter's machine. That bitch totally killed Peter! Somewhere in-between worrying about Olivia and accusing Olivia's mother of being a killer, Gary seems to have found a lot of time to work out. Those arms are looking good, Gary! The Al Baker story that started off with so much promise suddenly turns into these weird scenes in which Connie plays a major part and has many lines. Mack's office ends up filling up with homeless people -- no need to explain how we get there. Val makes a blink-and-you-miss-it when she refuses to call Abby to tell her that Olivia showed up at her house. Laura is MIA because she only has a handful of episodes left, so why not have her disappear for one of them? Ditto Lilimae. Greg deliciously tells Abby that she will never get her hands on Peter's money. Oooooh, how I wish they follow through with this and make it a big thing. And, finally, Infant!Olivia is questioned, tricked and arrested for murdering Peter. Abby barges in quite at the right moment and claims she killed Peter. Damn, it's all nearly touching!

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 4: HALF-TRUTHS

"Half-Truths" is such a fantastic little episode. It begins with Abby lying her ass off on the spot in order to get arrested and then continues with Abby lying even more during questioning. Following her release on bail, Abby and Olivia continue to manage not to communicate and it is Gary who (despite Jill's constant pleas to stay away from his ex-wives) finally solves the misunderstanding. After Gary tells Abby, the show makes us wait for several scenes before we get to the moment in which Abby and Olivia realize they both thought the other had done it but they are both, in fact, innocent. Abby and Olivia laugh and jump around at the beach in a moment that only KL of all the 80s soaps would ever be able to pull off. "We should communicate more" Olivia tells Abby, and it's really interesting to see how the writers used a murder to mend the relationship between the two. It's the type of writing I did not expect to see from the show any more. Both Val and Laura make their one appearance (Lilimae is MIA) and they are both so different from each other: Val's is bittersweet, with Val finding a way to tell the twins about Ben's leaving that they could understand, while Laura's is doom-laden, with McCashin doing some truly wonderful yet subtle acting as she tells Greg that she left the boys with Richard. The moment when Mac starts to suspect Paige may be Peter's killer is electric. One has the sense there could not be a worse thing to happen to him.

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 5: THERE ARE SMILES

The Paige stuff is fun. While Paige claims that Peter walked out of their argument after they made up, we see that Paige is responsible for the accident that killed Peter. Soon after, Paige comes clean to Mac and he not only makes her confess, but he finally acts like a parent and forces her to apologize, even if Paige clearly is putting on an act. Her feud with Abby is made of soapy excitingness, and I hope they follow through with Abby's desire to make Paige pay. Al's presence pays off majorly when both he and Lilimae discuss with Mac and Val what they read about smile therapy and then their fates collide when they meet at the cul-de-sac. Love for Lilimae? I think so. (DON'T tell me!). Val compensates with Ben's leaving by buying a fancy sports car and getting a horrible haircut that everyone in the cast has to say is beautiful. It's actually pretty hilarious stuff. She also calls the twins Gary's kids for the first time, something I'm sure will lead to hell. I think Jill also gets a haircut, but it makes her look more beautiful than ever. She and Gary fight, break up, make up, kiss, whatever. In the most fantastic Laura way ever, Laura tells Greg that she's dying. I knew it was coming, and yet... Damn you, KL -- tugging at the heartstrings with no mercy whatsoever.

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 6: THE GIFT OF LIFE

It's the Laura farewell episode that I wasn't ready for. Finally giving her the spotlight she ought to have had for years now, the show follows Laura's last few weeks alive in one hour-long goodbye. My God, it's like the finale of SIX FEET UNDER all over again. Every beat that needs to be covered is covered, to devastating results (for the viewer). From Greg's walk, to his single solitary tear, to Karen's reaction when she realizes Laura, their goodbye phone call, Laura giving Gary a kiss on the cheek after telling him how much she's enjoyed working with him. We even get one last Laura eye roll after a run-in with Abby. This episode is just as much about Karen as it is about Laura and Greg, and that's a little annoying, but in the end of the day, it is Val who Laura finds herself unable to tell her secret to. Their scene in the nursery with Meg still carries the echoes of their staircase scene following Laura's rape and speaks louder than any wailing from Karen could. Greg and Laura are even allowed one last scene of love-making, before Laura painfully packs her things, tidies up the house, leaves instructions to the help and hands Meg over to Greg for one last time. Greg won't even look at her. Laura stands behind him for a little bit, part of her unable to go, part of her wishing he would say something to her, but then she picks up her bag and exits, a final act of kindness not done for her. When Laura drives her car down the road and away from her life, and tells herself "Just hold on. Just hold on. Just hold on... don't lose it," that's Laura and McCashin and the audience in perfect synergy. What is it about Laura that devastates and appeals so much?

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 7: SAY UNCLE

It's almost like a KNOTS LANDING TWILIGHT ZONE. Suddenly, everything has to do with babies, women on posters, and Lilimae, who after having a grand total of maybe five scenes in a whole season so far, now suddenly appears in almost every scene. Even new scriptwriter Erica Byrne suddenly has everyone call Lilimae "guma" (or however it's spelled) which I don't think anyone has ever uttered ever before on this show. Listen, I ain't complainin, but it's transparent. Lilimae and Al have their first date and she is shocked to discover Al lives in his car. Say what you will about Al, but what you see with this guy is what you get. Gary is determined to be in the twins' lives but Val says no to him. He goes home and tells Jill that Val doesn't want him in Bobby and Betsy's lives, which makes it so hilarious that, the next time we see Jill, she walks into Gary's office and finds him with Val, Bobby and Betsy, looking very much like a family. Greg heartbreakingly is living in denial -- he tells everyone who'll listen that he's expecting Laura to come back. I can't say that's different than what the audience expects. The stuff with Michael felt like the definition of filler and must be the most ridiculous thing KL's ever done so far. Picture this: Michael's at the beach, listening to synth pop, when a sexy woman arrives. They catch each other's eye. An almost naked Paige soon arrives, making Beach Woman jealous. This couldn't be more 80s if it tried, and it's only made more ridiculous by the fact that Michael looks exactly twelve years old. The whole thing goes to another level of ridiculousness when Beach Woman Jody starts drowning and Michael saves her, but poor Pat Petersen can't even lift her, adding to the absurdity of it all. That horrific 80s burger joint they go to, however, gives me PEYTON PLACE vibes, so it's all good. And an ex of Abby's makes his way to Lotus Point but in the preview he looks like the Crypt Keeper, so he's DOA.

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 8: LOVE IN

What a surprising episode -- so different, so funny, and so refreshing. It's Date Night in Knots Landing and things are about to go cray cray. I was initially wary about the flashbacks (after all, we just went through a whole season of them), but it was very interesting to see young Abby, Karen and Sid (even if I'm still not sure Flashback Abby could become Future Abby) and they ended up being utterly charming. What I didn’t quite like was the implication that a lot of what Abby became (especially in regards to men) was due to Charles, although we certainly do see a lot of her smarts and scheming was present early on. I laughed so much when Jody sat on Michael in front of his parents – who does that? And what a shock when Eric comes home from college (is that where he disappeared to?) and announces he’s married. It’s like the writers got together and thought, "Let’s create the two most annoying women we can!" Karen's reactions to Jody and Linda are everything and I bet, after hearing about Linda, the sitting on Michael doesn’t seem so bad anymore. Al and Lilimae are on their own date and Al asks her to marry him. Talk about fast and furious! Lilimae has the same reaction but Al's "We’re bound to get acquainted if you marry me" was very sweet and very funny. Back home, Gary and Val have dinner with the twins and, for a few minutes, we get a glimpse of what life could have been for the Ewings had they reunited in Season 5. Of course, Gary would have screwed it all up anyway. Abby drives and flashbacks, which is always dangerous, but gets to Charles safe. "Tell me I’m the best you’ve ever had," she orders, or something to that effect, and Charles strokes her ego by agreeing. Oh, it's always so fun when Abby's so wicked!

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 9: FLIGHT OF THE SUNBIRDS

The less is said about Linda and her 1950s hair, the better. I sort of get the comparisons to an early Karen, but Lee has never, ever been as annoying or vapid as Linda. Thank God Linda’s gone by episode’s end. There is a very interesting physical similarity between Jody and Paige (who is MIA in this episode), especially during the wedding reception. Jody literally nags the balls off Michael with her fears and insecurities and random bullshit (did she really mention love?), but I can make the storyline more exciting in my head by theorizing that Michael has replaced Paige with Paige-lite (lite lite). The rest is much more engaging, particularly what involves Abby, Gary and Val. We get more glimpses of what family life would have been for Gary and Val, while Lilimae and Al rush towards exiting the series with a bunch of comedic brouhaha about a car and whatnot. It’s rather horrible seeing Abby being so commonly pathetic over a man, pinning away over a mummy. Part of it is that we never actually saw the writing earn this type of material. We are just told that Abby loves him with all her heart forever and ever, and are supposed to just accept it. however, Charles standing Abby up brings on some fun stuff like Abby staying at the restaurant to eat by herself, and the highlights of the episode: When Abby observes the connection Gary and Val have developed, she throws herself at Gary (prompting Gary's wonderful line: "Are you ever not performing?" before he gets her a drink and leaves her alone to drink it). Afterwards, she turns her attention to Jill, telling her that Gary is probably cheating with Val and would only be excited when cheating. After Gary seemingly spends the night with Val, Lilimae and Al leave for what I assume is forever. What a horrible exit, considering Val and Lilimae did not get a single goodbye moment just the two of them. That being said, there is something so strong and memorable in Lilimae's refusal to marry Al because she can’t leave Val. Considering Lilimae's earlier abandonment of Val and the resulting issues, to have reached a point, nine years later, where Lilimae refuses to leave means more than words can say. And, such, Val is able to let her go. How aptly titled the episode is, then, especially considering Lilimae's singing background. But it’s nothing compared to Greg's plight: After a rather touching scene in which he sees a couple of women that keep reminding him of Laura (the sort of thing that is always annoying and unconvincing on other shows, but somehow works here), Greg receives a call in the middle of the night and whispers to Meg: "It’s just you and me, kid." I am so not ready for this.

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 10: NOISES EVERYWHERE PART 1

For an episode titled “Noises Everywhere,” it is the quieter, silent moments here that resonate the most. Greg's outer peacefulness is almost maddening. Abby knowing that Val lied to her and yet showing the tiniest bit of compassion. Val touching Gary's arm after his heartbreaking admission that he has never made a difference in his life so far, despite having everything handed to him (oh, Gary, it’s why we fell in love with you all those years ago!).

Not that the agonizingly loud moments aren’t great in their own way: Val erupting and telling Karen what the whole audience has always thought about her on some level was brilliant. Mac wondering how the hell he became Karen's sidekick instead of his own person. Richard and Abby insulting each other. Richard fits right back into the show as if he didn’t miss a day.

But it’s scenes like Mac cracking a joke and everyone laughing despite themselves that drive the horror of Laura's death home. And the scenes in the funeral home? I kept waiting for Nate Fisher to show up. I would have paid to see Mac's reaction to David. And while everyone hugging everyone was a bit much, the sense of doom and gloom about Meg was very strong indeed. What a way to celebrate a 200th episode!

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 11: NOISES EVERYWHERE PART 2

An absolute classic. Laura should never have been killed off but they sure paid big tribute here. Jill has perhaps been the most interesting she’s ever been. The unnecessarily complicated Peter story notwithstanding (which, now that it’s over, is difficult to figure out why it ever mattered), seeing Jill get drunk and steal her brother’s ashes from Greg's coffee table was great fun. Jody shows up for literally a minute in order to be as annoying as she can. Mac is also fascinating here, as he continues to wallow in self-pity and the truth that, although he’s a father to so many kids, none of them are his. I don’t think Mac has ever been this tragic, and it suits him.

There is not much to be said about Laura's tape that probably hasn’t been said before, but I will say one thing: Any missteps, any mistakes the show has made, one can’t help but still look at the show favorably because, when Val's turn came, it remembered Laura sat on those steps and poured her heart out to Val, a scene that still haunts nine years later. It remembered . No other soap since has ever had this amount of emotional intelligence and connection with its fans that KNOTS had. And what about Abby's "I have nothing to say?" Amazing. And while Karen and Richard's friendship will always feel realer and deeper than Karen and Laura's, you can’t blame them for being sentimental.

Val's admission to Karen and Abby that Ben left is also poignant, especially Val's announcement that she will not divorce Ben because he might come back. If that’s not quintessentially Val, I don’t know what is. Earlier, Val and Gary shared another great moment, when Val insisted Gary could go because she’d be fine, but then broke down crying and Gary returned to hold her. It is not hard to remember why I fell in love with them all those years ago.

Greg says his goodbye to Laura personally, in a wonderfully acted scene by Devane. Laura has never quite been as verbose as she was on the tape (far from it), but I can’t help but be happy that she expressed all those emotions.

While Richard leaves on a note of bitterness ("I can’t stand it that she died alone!"), and Karen and Mac go home to make love, we get what is presumably our last glimpse of Laura, and Laura's haunting theme plays over the credits to remind us once again that, back then, Laura suffered alone, and right now, she suffered alone again, down to that last, bitter freeze frame.

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 12: WEAK MOMENT

The episode begins with Val and Gary in bed, one of those developments you saw coming but still manage to shock you. I love their scene at the beach. It brings back memories of Val's first time at the ocean. Their happiness is short-lived, however, when Jill walks out on Gary and goes straight to Val to tell her she could give Abby lessons in manipulation. It’s a nice little bookend to last week’s wonderful attitude that Jill had towards Val. Of course, this causes Val to push a very confused Gary away. Those two are so perfect for each other. You can in moments like when Val is the only one who ever finds Gary's silly jokes funny. To my surprise, Jill returns to the ranch, having regretted leaving Gary. I guess she realized that with Greg otherwise occupied and Peter dead, she had to justify her credit in some way.

Jody shows up for a minute and tells Michael disgusting things like, "this is the best Christmas party I’ve ever been to… because I’m with you." Barf. Hiss.

It’s all about art with Greg as he silently deals with Laura's death by investing in art and avoiding Meg. He also subtly flirts with Paige. I don’t know what it is about Nicollette Sheridan but she seemed much more natural and relaxed than she’s ever been before.

Mac and Karen share some sweet comedy regarding mistletoe and a trip to Tahiti, until Mac drops off Meg, claiming he has business in New York. I don’t believe him for a minute. Mac is overjoyed to have Meg for a few days.

The Charles story grates so much. It’s things like Gary acting as if Abby told him about Charles and how he broke her heart or the horrible, unbelievable casting of the character itself that completely make the storyline dead on arrival. Granted, Gary's reaction to realizing who Charles is was beyond hilarious: Shackelford’s face is priceless and he’s never been righter when he says, "That’s Charles? I need to take another look!" We did, Gary, and it didn’t make it any better. That being said, Abby and Charles’ roadside tiff was fun, although it was ruined by the sight of them making love. Yuck. I don’t think anyone ever asked to see Abby acting like a silly teenager.

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 13: ONLY 'TIL FRIDAY

KL is in a weird place right now. The once heavily plotted show has found itself coasting along on minimal amounts of story. Only 'Til Friday is almost exclusively an entire episode about Abby and Charles having sex (replaying the same scene in different ways over and over) and Karen and Mack, with their various family members, dealing with a crying baby (also replaying the same scene in different ways over and over). I found myself nostalgic for the days of Wolfbridge, or even Empire Valley, which also brought the realization that this is the first time in a long while that KL has not featured any type of business storyline – and the lack of it hurts the show.

Therefore, it comes as no surprise that the show introduces not one, but two, new storylines during the second half of the episode, perhaps recognizing itself that plot is desperately needed. We see the debut of hunky Bo from DAYS OF OUR LIVES sporting a bad Irish accent (I recall a scene with him and Paige down the line in which his accent sounded even worse, although I don’t remember what they talk about). Why not cast someone from Ireland? (Unless it’s to do with plot, so don’t tell me!). Then, Mysterious Pat and Julie move into Laura's old house, in scenes that are DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES Before DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES. Honestly, I found them relatively well handled and naturally done although it feels like they’re rushing to show us there’s mystery as quickly as possible. Regardless, they’ve got my attention, a good thing, since this is already my least favorite season of the show so far.

The only genuine drama of the episode comes from the reveal, to no one’s surprise, that Greg is hiding out at his ranch, and the accidental reveal of Val's to Gary that it was Jill who caused her to end their all too brief reunion. Now that Jill is involved in a story that makes sense and is dramatically meaty, she feels more interesting, alive, and substantial than ever. I loved the way she twisted Val pushing Gary away as a sign that she’s not interested. Oh, I sense some mess coming on.

The less is said about Abby being in love with The Mummy, the better.

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 14: TIES THAT BIND

The Johnny Rourke stuff is fun. From Paige mercilessly driving off without giving him a ride to his offer to limit their ‘relationship to the bed,’ and everything in-between. Peter Reckell fits miraculously well into the part, although all that singing stuff has been done before on the show and has been done better.

The interesting thing about the mysterious neighbors is that they use first Johnny and then Meg to incidentally reveal more about them. Tying them into other existing stories like this only serves to make them a little more relatable.

I think it’s such a fabulous idea that Lotus Point continues to face repercussions from the Peter thing. So often scandals like this on soaps are forgotten as soon as the story is over, with no long-term effects, and considering what Lotus Point is, it could not escape unscathed from a murder. Admittedly, however, it’s obvious Lotus Point is on its way out, and that prospect I am not happy about.

Baby/kids illnesses on soaps are also often used singularly to advance plot in some ways. It is no different in this case either, but the sheer weight of effect that it has (from revealing more information about Patricia, to bringing Greg back and the reveal that Mac and Karen have bonded with her) makes it worth the time.

Abby spends the entire episode completely freaking out over The Mummy. Her interactions with Judith, drinking in the bathroom, desperately trying not to cry, and her post-dinner moment with Greg ("How will you ever repay me?"), however, really save it. And not to mention one of the funniest, laugh-out-loud moments of the show when Charles shows up uninvited (once again) and, when Brian gets the hint from Olivia that they should make themselves scarce, the excuse he comes up with is, "There’s a great documentary on salamanders I wanted to see!" Abby's rolling of the eyes is everything.

Gary, Val and Jill take the week off.

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 15: ANOTHER MODEST PROPOSAL

Abby refuses to give Charles an answer on his marriage proposal, so he decides to do what any normal human being would: He throws a party in Abby's honor and gives her permission to not show up and humiliate him. Abby shows up, of course, and it’s not long before Judith crashes the party and reminds all of her and Charles’ society friends who really is the boss here. The resulting bitchery between Abby and Judith is of a kind we’ve never really seen before on KL (it’s reminiscent of DYNASTY, if it were better written), other than this storyline, and it really works. Even for Charles, since now Abby agrees to marry him.

Greg takes Meg back home, leaving Mac to mourn her absence. This leads to a really beautiful, quiet moment of Paige taking in Mac's desire to raise a baby, as she considers she never had that privilege for herself. Greg, meanwhile, isn’t exhibiting any signs of mourning Laura's death (at least, not any obvious ones), and Mac and Karen become even more concerned when Paige reveals that Greg never really went to New York. Despite his decision to never agree to take Meg again, when Greg brings her by at the end of the episode, Mac instantly agrees. It’s a unique and surprisingly engrossing story.

Johnny Rourke continues to surprise. "You never could keep your accent straight," Paige tells him (or something to that effect), after Johnny fluctuates between an Irish accent and a more British one, thus explaining really putting Reckell’s efforts under a better light. Out of nowhere, Ray Wise shows up as The Dealer, continuing his tour of soap operas, and you’d think it wouldn’t work on-screen but it’s thrilling as Johnny observes his moves, breaks into his room and steals some money. But the surprises don’t stop there: Instead of making off with the money, Johnny returns it to The Dealer and gets himself a new job. Fun!

Jill throws Gary a surprise birthday party that no one attends except Michael (it truly is pathetic), while at home, poor Valene puts together an explosion of balloons, banners and strings to celebrate the love of her life – which Gary is late to. It leads to a completely wonderful argument between the two, in which you can see and understand both sides, you can identify with both characters. Val decries Gary's irresponsibility, while Gary accuses Val of being someone you can never count on because she changes day by day.

Gary and Jill also have some very interesting interactions here. After Jill kicks one of the twins’ toys (surely showcasing signs of mental illness), she and Gary agree that they can’t go on the way that they have. Their exchange of flowers and chocolate is sweet and Jill's observation that she doesn’t remember why they got together was pungent and bitter in all the best ways. The two decide to remedy this by going to the movies, bickering over ice cream and, finally, some roadside head—I assume. After she screws with one of Gary's heads, she then plants an idea in the other: He doesn’t have to depend on Val's permission to see his kids. Uh oh….

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODES 16 & 17: IF NOT NOW, WHEN? & IN TOO DEEP

The season finally picks up in these two wonderfully put together episodes. While Olivia and Brian being such fans of Charles doesn’t make sense, and Charles continues to be awkward and creepy (his way of being sexual with Abby is patting her on the head), Charles and Judith's relationship is fascinating and entertaining (so this makes two women who are saving the character’s ass). Abby and Greg screwing them over by driving the price of EMC stock up was a lot of fun, although I hate to see the favor Abby owes Greg being used for this. Judith taping Abby and Charles’ conversations, only for Charles to choose Abby was also good and thankfully Charles seems to be planning something. I hope Judith's exit in "In Too Deep," isn’t her end.

Frank Williams arrives in Knots Landing and he could not be more obvious about hiding a secret. Mac soon realizes Frank isn’t being honest. There is a certain exciting element to Frank’s paranoia. My assumption is that he is feeling very guilty because he’s responsible for his family being in hiding and thus overcompensates by being ridiculously, over-the-top careful.

Jody's decision to sleep with Michael, while sudden, brings on some really exciting teenager story. "If I have sex with her, she’ll wanna be with me forever!" says Michael in one of the entire series’ funniest lines. I really like that he’s not in love with her and tells her outright. While Olivia and Jody's friendships comes out of nowhere, it’s exciting watching that slice of life: Two teenage girls talking about sex and relationships. I particularly like that they are not written to be shy or faux-virginal and innocent.

The Johnny stuff is also great. I really never expected it but his using Jody and Olivia, while creepy, and his drug sale at the diner, were very fun. Also, the lady that witnessed Johnny and The Dealer turning out to be dead instead of Jody was a brilliant switch on the audience.

Paige is becoming better by the minute. Her realization that she has feelings for Greg was touching and her late-night visit to Johnny to have sex with him was complex, arresting drama.

The best stuff comes from Karen, who gets really interesting material (not wanting to talk about the Williamses in front of Michael and Jody) and Val/Gary, whose fight over the twins escalates to new heights when papers are served and depositions are made. Karen's predicament here is thrilling and, while her decision to tell the truth was predictable, it is still great soap.

Best line is from Jill: "Gary, those are legal terms. They don’t mean what you think they mean."

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 18: THE BLUSHING BRIDE

The Williams mystery is beginning to annoy, at least on the Williams’ side. It’s always been contrived and somewhat unconvincing, but now the actors are trying to sell us in regards to their marriage and relationship, and it isn’t working. Their sudden desire to have sex rings especially untrue. It doesn’t help that we mainly see them now from Karen and Mack's point of view, although that element is certainly a lot more fun. The don’t-turn-on-the-lights-I’m-spying shtick is enjoyable and the moment Mack reveals he’s now suspicious is very funny. Thankfully, the story picks up a little steam when Karen and Mack witness Pat leave with another woman in the dead of night.

Things with Greg and Paige, Gary and Val and Abby and Charles are much better. Greg continues to make Paige jealous (if he’s grieving his wife’s death, we don’t know), which pushes Paige towards Johnny once more. In the meantime, Johnny's accent has gotten worse and his singing is truly atrocious. I still like him, however, and Peter Reckell has really surprised me with his performances.

Karen and Mack urge Val to change her deposition. The story interestingly brings out Mack and Val's special bond once more (a note not often played), which I have always found more organic and convincing than her supposed best-friend relationship with Karen. Mack becomes very sweet and tender with Val and it’s always touching. Karen's question to Val about why she’s doing this is so great – we all know the answer but the show doesn’t actually articulate it, and it somehow makes it stronger. Val's relieved when she changes her statement, although I fear she may come to regret it if Gary ever decides to seek custody.

Lotus Point not only has a beach, but a marina as well. Who knew? (Someone might recall an earlier reference to their existence, so don’t sue me). Gary wishing Abby good luck and kissing her is the best moment of the episode. Charles having planned to use Abby like this may feel like a last-minute change in the story (perhaps in response to the character’s reception?) but it’s one that almost makes all the suffering the show put us through worth it. Abby running into the bathroom to cry is also a top moment, and your heart really breaks for her. But then Abby emerges from her night-long revenge planning session, and one can’t help but rejoice at the fact that Abby is finally, finally back. Amanda Woodward on MELROSE PLACE went through the same thing, it was utterly painful, and her return to form was a blessing. Now, make that Mummy pay, Abby!

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 19: LAWFULLY WEDDED

This episode is such a surprise: Mostly focusing on two storylines, it delivers unexpected developments in both cases. I never thought Abby would go through with the wedding but it all becomes clear soon enough: She cons Charles into giving her nearly 3 million dollars as a wedding gift before revealing that she knows all about his betrayal. I wanted to see him suffer for every one of the episodes he made us suffer. As far as Abby schemes go, this one’s pretty tame, but it is so wonderful to see Charles flail about in shock and anger. God, it felt so good. I thought the story would go on for several more episodes but maybe the Soap Gods have smiled on us and he is gone forever. The only good thing that came out of this was Donna Mills’ increased airtime.

After Frank amusingly tears Mack a new one for being nosy, it is revealed that the Williamses are in the Witness Protection Program. What a surprise. We also learn that Pat is responsible for this situation, which ruins my little theory about Frank feeling guilty and therefore going overboard. As it stands, he is merely paranoid, which is so much less fun. For one exciting moment, it looked like they would all move away (all the Williamses and Charles in one episode? That’s maybe too much to ask!) but Pat has a four minute long freak-out about grass and birds and test grades or whatever. Admittedly, it’s a memorable scene, the only worthwhile scene in this story so far, and Lynne Moody gave it her all.

The situation with Meg continues to build up quite beautifully, as none of the MacKenzies can deny the weirdness of their situation anymore. I loved Greg walking away without an answer when Paige asked him about Meg.

The Dealer gets a call from one of the men working with Charles and tells him "they’re in." Johnny is also involved. I have no idea what’s going on. Olivia names a star after Abby and Charles. Gag worthy. Enough already.

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODE 20: BOUNCING BABIES

Well, that’s more like it – this is possibly the best episode of the season so far (note, no Charles, or the Williams story) and it’s almost completely all about the kids.

Paige and Johnny are so fascinating. Despite Johnny's efforts, Paige is only interested in being friends with benefits. It’s "just for sex," she says. Not only is it the woman in the scenario that is not interested in a relationship, but the show doesn’t demonize her for wanting and enjoying casual sex. Is it wrong to assume this must have been rather progressive at the timeframe it was aired?

Abby invests Charles’ money into the expansion of the marina, shocking both Karen and Gary. The storyline is left for another time and it promises a lot of drama. I hope it delivers. In the meantime, Abby deals with another one of Olivia's freak-outs. Olivia being so upset about Charles is annoying, although her declaration that Abby is not a good mother, not to mention her "why can’t you keep a man?" was pretty accurate and gave Olivia some good motivation.

"Laura, you really outdid yourself this time," Karen says while looking at Meg. It’s subtle grief, and we haven’t seen nearly enough of it. Things with Meg come to a head when Greg decides to take her back home, leaving Mack and Karen devastated. The effect this has on Mack is tremendous. For a character who’s spent most of his time on the show involved in police/crime investigations, Mack's desire for a baby and sadness over Meg is perhaps his best story so far, and such a thrilling way to use the character. Much like Lee, Dobson does a lot of screaming and loud acting, but it is this quiet breaking of his heart that resonates so very much.

Gary and Val's case goes to the Judge. Val's confrontation of Gary serves as a great little climax/pay off to the story, as things change rapidly following the developments in Meg's storyline. In true KNOTS fashion, Mack and Karen losing the baby they were so attached to gets to Val and she officially acknowledges Gary as the father of the twins. In a surprising move, Gary tears up the paper, and Gary and Val touchingly hug. It speaks volumes about them.

Greg starts to build Meg a playhouse but it’s clear that he’s a stranger to her. I never in a million years expected Karen to go to Greg and ask that he give them Meg. Whether I hate or love that move is something I probably need to think about, but Greg comes to see that it would be the best option. Brilliantly, it all leads back to Paul Galveston and the lasting effect that man had on Greg, which leads Greg to realize that he wouldn’t be a good influence in Meg's life. He wants Meg to know about Laura one day but asks that he not be part of her life.

It’s such a devastating, unpredictable-yet-totally-understandable decision, and a very unique story. And despite the ridiculousness of Greg being able to build that playhouse so well and so fast on his own, it is all worth it for the harrowing last scene, in which he burns it with tears in his eyes.

Absolutely classic stuff.

DDD

 

[JROG]

EPISODES 21 & 22: A FAIR RACE & FULL DISCLOSURE

The Greg/Paige interplay is great fun. There is a sense that the writers have finally figured out who Paige is and how they want to play her. Watching Greg and Paige mess with each other’s heads, and Johnny and Greg competing for Paige, were highlights. I have heard many bad things about Johnny, but I like him, appreciate his sense of humor, and Reckell and Sheridan's chemistry is great. Of course, the writers have lucked into megatons of chemistry between Devane and Sheridan – they’re so hot together that it doesn’t matter that he’s twice her age. At least the show acknowledges the whole thing.

Because she’s a magnet for all kinds of crap, Olivia has a chance run-in with Harold, the would-be mafioso who breaks arms and makes bad jokes, and they promptly start dating. Harold does threatening things like pulling poor people’s ears. But, hey, he’s cute. Any doubts Abby may have had about Olivia dating Harold are somewhat assuaged by the fact that Harold's 'uncle,' Manny, runs a yachting company and would love to use the Lotus Point marina. And, thus, Abby has brought poor Karen into another mafia mess once more.

Gary suddenly decides he no longer wants to run Lotus Point (was it because "Lotus Pint" was such a bad joke?) and announces that he’s moving on to the next thing in his life… when he figures it out. Thus Lotus Point starts to become even more irrelevant than it already feels, and I am not ready to see it go.

The Williamses take "Fair Race" off (their second episode in a row being absent), but return with a vengeance in "Full Disclosure" when—shocker—the neighbors are all hanging out outside, playing with the kids. In one of those weird accidents that scream Lechowick, a constructor’s ladder’s latch thingy doesn’t attach properly, causing the ladder to crash through the Williams living room window. Mayhem ensues. Frank, over-the-top paranoid that he is, runs out in the middle of the day with a gun and threatens to shoot the worker. Mack, Pat and Karen desperately try to calm him down. The scene reminds me a little of the mayhem that followed Lilimae running over Chip and it’s certainly a high-charged, unexpected start to the episode.

When Pat goes to court to testify, we follow her, and the juxtaposition of Pat breaking down on the witness stand, and Frank crying next to the fireplace where he was burning off his past, so to speak, was very effective. There is a lovely moment afterwards when someone tries to kill Pat and we see blood splattered on the floor as the elevator doors close.

In the meantime, Mack and Karen clock in more hours spying through their living room window than at work, which is certainly amusing. Mack apparently needs Jill to figure out that this is a Witness Security case and, when Pat returns with an injured arm, they finally put everything together. The scene where Mack and Karen go over with bagels and beer to the Williamses is rather sweet. This episode helped me care for Pat more than ever before. And the sight of Frank in that wife beater wasn’t half bad.

The twins continue to get in the way of Jill's love life and, before you know it, she’s going psycho and emptying out whole bottles of wine on her own. But, really, who can blame her? Gary is so insensitive, he keeps laughing in her face. Not to mention he’s apparently a prude and doesn’t want the twins to see Jill sleeping in his bed before they’re married. After Jill buys a one-way ticket to psychoville, Val returns home while ominous music plays in the background. She walks into the kitchen and we hear her gasp, and one half-expects the kitchen to be smeared in blood or cow poop (don’t ask why cow specifically), but we see Val holding a letter. Oh my God – it’s from Ben! And he’s apparently coming back! Well, now, that’s a twist (and Val's first freeze frame of the season!).

DDD