Was Pam too harsh on Lucy?

[Jimmy Todd]

After Lucy was raped by Roger and subsequently learned she was pregnant. Pam went with her when Lucy had the abortion. After the abortion, Lucy went into a depression and Pam gave her some "tough love" and told her to "join the land of the living."
This may have been what Lucy needed, but was she a bit harsh? Lucy had been raped and was having second thoughts about whether she did the right thing or not by having the abortion. Was this Texas Ewing approach of pull yourself up and get over it appropriate or should Pam been a tad gentler? After all, Pam's inability to conceive landed her in psychiatric care. Nobody told her to get over it.

 

[Chris2]

After all, Pam's inability to conceive landed her in psychiatric care. Nobody told her to get over it.

Maybe somebody should have.

 

[Luke_Krebbs_Ewing]

Maybe somebody should have.

Yeah. The two circumstances are different though. Lucy could get pregnant again with the right man. Poor Pam had two miscarriages which unfortunately resulted in her not being able to carry a baby to full term. I'm not surprised she needed psychiatric care as that is a devastating loss to any woman not being able to bear a child from the man you love. At least Bobby gave her all the love he could to help her through it, when he wasn't fighting with JR over Ewing Oil.

 

[Jimmy Todd]

Yeah. The two circumstances are different though. Lucy could get pregnant again with the right man. Poor Pam had two miscarriages which unfortunately resulted in her not being able to carry a baby to full term. I'm not surprised she needed psychiatric care as that is a devastating loss to any woman not being able to bear a child from the man you love. At least Bobby gave her all the love he could to help her through it, when he wasn't fighting with JR over Ewing Oil.

In addition to having an abortion, Lucy had been raped. It seems she would need more than just Pam's tough love.

 

[Luke_Krebbs_Ewing]

In addition to having an abortion, Lucy had been raped. It seems she would need more than just Pam's tough love.

Pam was only trying to help her.

Pam was there for her so that she could pull herself together. Pam could only love her and help her so much, she would need to take time to come to terms with being raped and having to abort Roger's baby. At least Pam was there for her, what more could she have done?

 

[Snarky Oracle!]

This occurred at the point where Victoria was trying to make Pam edgier and tougher in her performance (and largely succeeded) so her delivery here was probably a bit more contemptuous than perhaps it should have been.

We laughed about it at the time. We were dubbing fake dialogue over the episodes at the time, and had Pam angrily telling Lucy she was "a whore" and that if Lucy didn't get off her ass "I'm going to kill you!!"

It still makes me giggle all these years later.

 

[Jimmy Todd]

Pam was only trying to help her.

Pam was there for her so that she could pull herself together. Pam could only love her and help her so much, she would need to take time to come to terms with being raped and having to abort Roger's baby. At least Pam was there for her, what more could she have done?

True. Pam's motives were pure.
I wish they had kept up Pam and Lucy's friendship throughout the series. It added something to both characters. However, if I recall correctly, that was one of the last times they interacted.

 

[DallasFanForever]

I think Pam was just trying to help Lucy put her life back together and move on. I wouldn’t say she was too harsh on Lucy as much as maybe being a little insensitive. Rape and then the subsequent decision of whether or not to have an abortion are serious issues and Lucy probably could’ve used a little more time to pull herself together. But I think Pam’s heart was in the right place.

 

[Mustard]

True. Pam's motives were pure.
I wish they had kept up Pam and Lucy's friendship throughout the series. It added something to both characters. However, if I recall correctly, that was one of the last times they interacted.

They were friends for about 6 of the DVD series, weren't they? Once Pam left Southfork in Series 6 DVD over the Battle for Ewing Oil, she didn't return to Southfork to live until Series 10 DVD (Lucy was gone then). The one odd bit was when Bobby mentioned Lucy in the Season 8 DVD finale Swan Song, and Pam's reaction was like she barely knew Lucy. Other than that, you can easily lose touch with friends and people you like when you move to a new house, job, city/town etc.

 

[Jimmy Todd]

They were friends for about 6 of the DVD series, weren't they? Once Pam left Southfork in Series 6 DVD over the Battle for Ewing Oil, she didn't return to Southfork to live until Series 10 DVD (Lucy was gone then). The one odd bit was when Bobby mentioned Lucy in the Season 8 DVD finale Swan Song, and Pam's reaction was like she barely knew Lucy. Other than that, you can easily lose touch with friends and people you like when you move to a new house, job, city/town etc.

I remember that scene. Bobby mentioned Lucy's wedding and Pam seemed indifferent. The writers could have added a line in which Pam said Lucy invited her but she declined because she didn't want to make it awkward for Bobby and Jenna.

 

[Chris2]

I thought it was realistic that Lucy was no longer close with her uncle’s ex wife. I had a brother in law I was once pretty close to, but once he and my sister divorced, that was it.

 

[Jimmy Todd]

I thought it was realistic that Lucy was no longer close with her uncle’s ex wife. I had a brother in law I was once pretty close to, but once he and my sister divorced, that was it.

Good point. My earlier idea about Pam mentioning being invited Lucy's wedding makes less sense now.

 

[Mustard]

I thought it was realistic that Lucy was no longer close with her uncle’s ex wife. I had a brother in law I was once pretty close to, but once he and my sister divorced, that was it.

In terms of not visiting Lucy and losing touch with her, yes. But to act like you barely knew her when told by Bobby face-to-face that she was getting married?

 

[DallasFanForever]

In terms of not visiting Lucy and losing touch with her, yes. But to act like you barely knew her when told by Bobby face-to-face that she was getting married?

I always took that scene as maybe not so much she was acting like she didn’t know Lucy anymore but more like she was just being indifferent to what Bobby was telling her at that point. I think her reaction was more along the lines of “That’s why you drove over here? To tell me this?” But once she realizes why he’s telling her that, to prove that the Ewings all do marry the same person twice, then she seems to smile at the thought of Lucy and Mitch remarrying. So I think it was more that what he said surprised her and perhaps even confused her more than it was she didn’t care about Lucy anymore. Just my way of looking at it I guess.

 

[Toni]

Patrick and Victoria acted the hell out of that "Swan Song" scene, and she hinted things without saying anything... I wonder what she really thought of her second marriage to Mitch, the fact of Jenna being released or Charlie being "officially" his daughter.

About the abortion scenes, Pam didn´t slap her so she wasn´t too harsh on her (ask JR about it...Or Katherine...!).

 

[Luke_Krebbs_Ewing]

Patrick and Victoria acted the hell out of that "Swan Song" scene, and she hinted things without saying anything... I wonder what she really thought of her second marriage to Mitch, the fact of Jenna being released or Charlie being "officially" his daughter.

About the abortion scenes, Pam didn´t slap her so she wasn´t too harsh on her (ask JR about it...Or Katherine...!).

Pam had a great right hook in that punch. Although of course Victoria doesn't land her hand anywhere near Larry's face, it's the angle of the camera which makes it look like she did.

Victoria did anger very well. As Katherine once said, Pam was a sweet darling and everyone adored her!! Well, everyone but her & JR!

 

[bmasters9]

Maybe somebody should have.

Indeed-- if Pam was going to act like it was a big deal about Lucy's abortion no matter the cause, then I think she should have gotten as good as she gave (the way I'm understanding this).

 

[Bobby Southworth]

Yes. Lucy had just had the abortion, and Pam was somewhat mean in pushing her to get out and do something. Perhaps this was in Lucy's best interest, but Pam was being a major hypocrite, and in my opinion, insensitive.

 

[bmasters9]

Yes. Lucy had just had the abortion, and Pam was somewhat mean in pushing her to get out and do something. Perhaps this was in Lucy's best interest, but Pam was being a major hypocrite, and in my opinion, insensitive.

Indeed-- issues like that do cut both ways.