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If Dallas Did a Moldavian Massacre

Ray_Krebbs

Ray_Krebbs

Telly Talk Well-Known Member
The infamous Dynasty cliffhanger is now on Pluto TV as I am typing. If Dallas did a similar type of cliffhanger, how would you have gone about it? Who would be killed, injured, and unharmed? In mine Lucy falls for the prince of an Eastern European country. His mother the queen was once involved with J.R., but her late husband was still in the picture at the time. J.R. is set on this wedding between Lucy to take place in order to secure the Ewings a place in royalty and access to the country's resources. A group in the queen's circle plan a coup d'etat and come guns a blazin after Lucy and the prince exchange vows. In my version, the outcome would be more realistic than Dynasty. There'd be more casualties and serious injuries. J.R. is missing in the aftermath, causing people to wonder if he was behind it.
 
Monzo

Monzo

Telly Talk Enthusiast
If there had been such a massacre in Dallas, it should have happened where the action was on the show: on Southfork.

Instead of planting bombs, Angelica Nero should have shown up on Southfork with a few gunmen who could have fired submachine guns into the crowd at the annual Ewing Barbecue. Conveniently, the season with Angelica turned out to be a dream and the writers didn't have to worry about who was going to die.
 
Willie Oleson

Willie Oleson

Telly Talk Schemer
Monzo said:
Conveniently, the season with Angelica turned out to be a dream and the writers didn't have to worry about who was going to die
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Yes, in hindsight that cliffhanger could have been much more outrageous. We only got two bombs and nobody cared if Jamie Ewing was going to die or not.
Without the shower twist this would have been a mediocre season finale.

If Dynasty had done a dream then it didn't have to be a whole season, just the day of the wedding. Viewers would still be pissed off but as a peace offering the writers could have given us Alexis on the throne. And Blake and Krystle should be forced to call her Your Majesty.
The Carringtons and the Royal Family travel back to America and the revolution happens off-screen which means that ex-King and ex-Prince have to stay in Denver.
Then I want Krystle, very gently and slowly, take the crown from Alexis' head and say - almost in a friendly way - "let me help you with that".
 
Matthew Blaisdel

Matthew Blaisdel

Telly Talk Star
Rove

Rove

Telly Talk Warrior
Monzo said:
Instead of planting bombs, Angelica Nero should have shown up on Southfork with a few gunmen who could have fired submachine guns
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Better yet...Miss Ellie should have tipped over a few caterers carts and requested Ray to get her shotgun. Imagine the scene. Guests are scurrying about while the Ewing family are having a shoot-out with Angelica Nero (in a dress provided by Nolan Miller) and her henchmen. Jock would have been proud.
 
Luke_Krebbs_Ewing

Luke_Krebbs_Ewing

Telly Talk Champion
LMLDallas78 said:
If Dallas ever did such a rubbishy bonkers Dynasty type scene, it would be done so much better.

Dallas got bonkers later on, but early Dallas would have done such a scene with class and taste and a real Cliffhanger who lives, who dies?

I'm sure we could all list the ones we would have liked to be massacred.
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Number One would be Priscilla Presley's version of Jenna Wade. Sorry Mom but all that pouting and whining over emeralds drives me cockaloopy bonkers!

Number Two my half sister Charlie. What a brat she is, she once told me I was Bobby's horse!

Number Three the Winger tramp for obvious reasons.

Number Four Darius. That horse kicks, unfortunately it didn't kick my dear half sister! What a pity.

Number Five Amos Krebbs what an awful man he was. I much preferred that lovely Doctor Seth Hazlitt in Murder She Wrote. :)
 
Taylor Bennett Jr.

Taylor Bennett Jr.

Telly Talk Winner
LMLDallas78 said:
If Dallas ever did such a rubbishy bonkers Dynasty type scene, it would be done so much better.
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when Jordan Lee was shot in the phone booth it should have been part of a Godfather-style montage where everyone on the show gets killed in their own phone booth. First Jordan, then the rest of the Cartel, then everyone else, ending with the Ewings, JR last of course. People who had left the show could have made return “getting killed in phone booth” cameos. They could have used the “disco-fied” Dallas theme from Lessons for the music.

All other episodes from that point on could have been a random smattering of the stock music cues from early season 4 on over a blank screen for the full hour.

Who needs Conundrum?
 
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Monzo

Monzo

Telly Talk Enthusiast
The perfect time for a massacre would have been the season 10 finale. They would have just had to rewrite the script of the last few episodes a bit and make sure that all the characters were in the same place at the same time, then B.D. Calhoun (still alive and on the run) showed up and fired with a machine gun. In the season 11 opener we would have learned that Pam, Donna, Mandy and Jack (who would have been dragged along throughout season 10) would have died. In this way, Dallas would have shown Dynasty how a big aftermath is made.
 
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D

DallasFanForever

Telly Talk Supreme
Oh, I think I’ll pass on this one. This is a great ‘what if’ thread and I’m finding it highly entertaining but I feel one prime time massacre in the 80s was enough. This is a storyline best left to Dynasty and Moldavia.

Of course, if it did happen hypothetically, I think the perfect time would’ve been at Pam’s wedding to Mark and definitely spearheaded by the great Angelica Nero. It would’ve been conveniently written off as a dream anyway so the timing would’ve been perfect. They virtually could’ve killed off anyone they wanted to in this scenario.

I believe the bigger question is had it been done in a season other than the dream how would Dallas have handled the fallout from such a massacre? Would they have bungled it like Dynasty did or would it have been resolved any better?
 
Alexis

Alexis

Telly Talk Superhero
If Dallas did a Moldavian Massacre we all know they would have just got rid of the women. I mean they did it in drips and drabs anyway. Even if they did kill off a man in such a massacre chances are he would have stepped out of the shower after, alive and well and smelling of Irish Spring.
 
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