- Awards
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Miss Wheeler, I love you.
Do you?
Don't question the facts. It's most unscientific.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Carry On Teacher (1959)
Never thought I'd watch my first Carry On on netflix, and I also discovered that they stream lots of British classics including the Studiocanal/Vintage Series of which I have several on DVD.
Now I can't remember why I thought these films would be inaccessibly British, or why that idea would enter my mind to begin with.
While I knew Richard O'Sullivan was in this one as a child actor, I had convinced myself that Dennis Waterman, too, was in this one. I was rather surprised at my level of disappointment on being reminded this is not the case. The majority of the kids in the film are notable for their lack of precociousness. At least one of the girls, unfortunately, appears to have had elocution lessons, but there's nothing jarringly syrupy or twee about them.
There are some great lines here. Joan Sims is involved in my two personal favourites, both of which seem rather daring for the late '50s.
One of them comes from Joan blowing her whistle which makes no sound. Looking inside she furiously ejaculates "they've taken the pea".
The second exchange is after Joan's tiny gym shorts rip when she bends over (is this the first Carry On wardrobe malfunction?), something she bemoans repeatedly in the staff room. Asked to shut up about her shorts, Joan wails "You haven't seen the hole in them", to which blatantly gay Charles Hawtrey does one of his trademark horrified stage jolts and retorts "I've no wish to".
The latter example in particular seems as filthy as anything the Carry Ons were able to get past the censors over the next decade and a half. At least to my smutty mind.
I imagine these are the more overtly sleazy ones, and while that doesn't offend me at all I do think it takes the "double" out of the double entendre, and then the joke doesn't land anymore.but the really terrible ones came towards the end of the series
Yes, several related titles came up in the Carry On search and I've randomly added She'll Have To Go and On The Buses to the list.Incidentally, there are several "sub-Carry On" films that were made during the same era from the same team
I remember the comments saying that it was very hammy and that the reveal came because of an inexplicably uncharacteristic, emotional outburst rather than being cleverly checkmated - which I interpret as a deus ex machina.
Do you recognise any of that or was the review exaggerated?
I imagine these are the more overtly sleazy ones, and while that doesn't offend me at all I do think it takes the "double" out of the double entendre, and then the joke doesn't land anymore.
Yes, several related titles came up in the Carry On search and I've randomly added She'll Have To Go and On The Buses to the list.
It was a little abundant in the SFX department to the point of being cartoony at times. All the same, I found it very enjoyable. Shades of Kind Hearts and Coronets and Blithe Spirit with a dash of early Carry On. And, inexplicably, a character bursting into a serious romantic song at a random moment.
I think I might be overstretching myself, therefore I have no idea when the next Carry On will be shown in Cinema Mercantile.
My plans for 2025 have been ruthlessly sabotaged by many detours and distractions. I got lots of great stuff instead and I like to think that it was necessary for my "personal growth" as Oprah would say it, but the fact remains that it happened at the expense of other and earlier ambitions.
One more thing (how Columbo of me) I'd like to mention about CARRY ON TEACHER is that the school play disaster is surprisingly similar to CARRIE's iconic prom scene. Minus the kill count, of course.

I like the world-building of the Engineers
what was most impressive about this Alien-adjacent project was the degree of world-building taking place. New concepts, ideas and innovations are to be found left, right and centre, and the balance between the familiar and the new was spot-on.
After that it all becomes predictable routine, and there are several dangerous scenes with lots of physical activity that are impossible to watch because it's all fast-moving CGI images.
There's obviously more CGI than in 1979's Alien, but it seems to be used relatively sparingly and stops short of unnatural artifice. It's most noticeable during scenes featuring holograms and suchlike, when one would expect it to look artificial. For the rest of the film there seem to be plenty of practical sets and effects.
someone has to outsmart a sexist self-operation bed
That's being 90 years old for all eternity.
I have no fondness for either films, but the sequel trots out of a lot of the villains from the original cartoons, which is a bit of fun. You can get the gist of that, though, from a few clips on Youtube.a terrible film that made me instantly remove the sequel from my watch list.
I wonder if Prometheus was meant to be a completely different sci-fi story, and that the studio was only willing to fund it if he would cram it into the Alien franchise.
I have no fondness for either films, but the sequel trots out of a lot of the villains from the original cartoons, which is a bit of fun.
I also have a smidge of resentment towards these movies. Gen X pop culture repackaged for Millennials, who then have more nostalgia for the cruddy remakes than the originals.
The story follows Joan (Elizabeth Olsen) as she arrives at a transit hub for dead people where they must choose a time from their past that they are to inhabit for all of eternity. Joan faces a emotional dilemma of having to choose between the husband she spent sixty years with (Miles Teller) and her first love (Callum Turner), who died decades earlier and has been waiting for her. The film asks whether a "perfect" moment in Joan's past is more valuable than the messy reality of her life fully lived.
Was there actually a rogues gallery of villains that were known?

It's a high concept film but it's not executed in a deep and profound way, and it's probably all the better for it.This is one of those examples where the concept itself is so very fascinating I find myself wondering if the film could live up to it.
I haven't seen a Scooby Doo cartoon in decades, but some of these one-time appearance fraud-villains are seared into my memory.
It's a high concept film but it's not executed in a deep and profound way, and it's probably all the better for it.
